Hopefully not the Voice of Reason

I'm at work right now, so in short:

D.C. 2-0 Chicago
(D.C. advances 2-1)

New England 3-2 New York
(New England advances 3-2)

Houston 2-1 FC Dallas
(FC Dallas advances on PKs)

Chivas USA 2-1 Kansas City
(Chivas USA advances on PKs)